Hyūga Hinata, the One and Only
by Loopholes47
Summary: That shy, meek girl? Great. Now I'm suddenly glad for all those drama classes I took in my old life. I mean, Hinata is one of my favs, but it's going to be a blow to my ego to make my personality match hers. I'll be red in the face- hey, isn't that good? (SI OC into Hyūga Hinata!)
1. The Greatest of 'em all

**Hy****ū****ga Hinata, the One and Only**

**That shy, meek girl? Great. Now I'm suddenly glad for all those drama classes I took in my old life. I mean, Hinata is one of my favs, but it's going to be a blow to my ego to make my personality match hers. I'll be red in the face- hey, isn't that good? (SI OC into Hy****ū****ga Hinata!)**

**Disclaimer- Masashi Kishimoto has all rights. The poor, pitiful person trapped inside Hinata is mine.**

**Quote- "When God said, ****_Let there be light_****, Chuck Norris flipped on the switch."**

**Onwards with the story!**

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**XXX **

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Yo.

How'a ya' doin'?

If anybody asks, my name is Hyūga Hinata.

But what they don't know is that I had another name before that.

Now, I'm not going to go into any more details concerning my 'other' name, but I can tell you that it was foreign. It was pronounced differently than all the other names around here, in the world Hyūga Hinata is living in. She was born late in December, while the person from the other world was given birth to in around late spring, or very early summer.

She, the other person, was actually quite scared when 'she' suddenly popped out of her _new_ mother's womb and forced into the body of someone she knew. I should know; I was there on that dreadful fate-hating day. Well, I didn't really _know_ Hinata like she was my best friend. Really, the only source of my Intel about her was a certain book series that changed my life. Literally. And I didn't know if it was for the better or the worse. And I wasn't just going to find out.

Back in my old life, in my old world, when I went by a different alias, I was a sadistic pacifist who loved to create chaos and fight bad guys and read erotica stories. Yes- I mean erotica as in porn. Smut. Lemon. Whatever the hell it goes by these days. It all started when I accidently wandered into the adult sections of the local library back then, when I was eleven years of age. Of course, I had no idea of what the hell it was, so I kept reading. And reading. And reading. I was rather intrigued by it.

You may call me a pervert, weirdo, demented, mentally sick, but it's true. Porn is rather addictive. Of course, only if you don't know the meanings of the certain body parts. I had no idea back then, so when I researched it, my eyes bulged. But then a very nasty smile snaked its way up about how many pranks I could play.

And those pranks worked wonderfully.

Especially on family members.

I was an evil little girl, but everyone bought the image of me being a good girl because nobody ever caught me. Not once. Of course, it's incredibly boring to just be self-restraint all the way, so sometimes I let it slip that a little prankster was in the house. Having four other siblings really did drive Mom and Dad bonkers on who left a little 'gift' on their bed.

(P.S: It was a pair of G-string black lace underwear for women and masculine boxers for manly men. Don't ask where I got them. Let's just say it was left over booze and paying a sexy lady.)

That was pretty much it, besides my loud, insane attitude. Yep. Total opposite of Hinata. Not even Hyūga-worthy, I was. So it was really maddening to try and keep up her 'timid, meek, shy girl persona' when I still had to keep the pranks going along in my head.

I know, I know. I'm me, and she's her, so it doesn't matter if I let her personality drop, does it?

Why, it really, really does.

You see, without Hinata's heartfelt words- especially coming from a self-conscious girl- Naruto wouldn't have opened up the Kyūbi as easily without thinking that Pain just killed one of his precious people, and a precious person who had a bright, kind future ahead of her.

And if Hinata becomes the heir to her clan, then jack shit would happen.

Also, Hinata was losing confidence during when the Ten Tailed Beast tried to hit her with the thorns, so Neji sacrificed himself, and without that, Naruto wouldn't have a reason to marry her!

FYI, I am heads over tails for Naruhina, but I seriously do not like NaruOC, with me being the OC. Or NaruSaku. Or Naru#Everybody. Maybe NaruIno is okay, but I have to be in a certain mood in order to keep reading those kinds of fanfictions.

So here I am, randomly playing with my new 'Kaa-san', Hyūga Himawari. I was eight months old. I skipped through the whole newborn business because that was a memory I never _ever_ wanted to _ever_ think about _ever_ again. Darn, huge blow to my ego, being washed and fed by hand. _Don't _even get _started_ on diapers. I grew pretty attached to her, mainly because she was the only person I was ever allowed to see, being a baby. And a fragile heir to a prestigious clan. Prestigious my ass. They were just arrogant sticks in the mud who couldn't find their own path. Of course, I can't really blame Neji because he had a rough life. It was only natural for someone so young like him to turn into an ass. And another exception was Himawari, who was way too gentle and kind and loving. Her hair swept from side to side. And the color… Ooh! Her hair color definitely beat midnight by a thousand fold.

I wonder if my hair- Hinata's hair, I mean- will ever be that beautiful. But I like having short hair. Short and messy hair. The bangs were stylish, so I'm gonna' keep that, but how about the back of her scalp? Since it wouldn't actually change the plot, I guess it is exceptional. Maybe when my hair finally is a _really_ long length, I'll cut it with blunt Kunai. Right in front of everyone. I can say, "Oh. The man in the window told me to cut it. He wants my hair for some kind of chakra-investigation. He said his name was Danzō." I really do hate Danzō, but the information isn't enough to arrest him, thank god. Don't be misjudged, I really hate that bastard, even more so than Orochimaru, (GASP!) but ruining the plot may as well lead to so Boom-Boom and Shitty Deaths that shouldn't happen and the Canon would collapse. Even as frustrating as it is, I will persevere and keep on with the story-line. As sad as it is, if anything changes with it, the world will turn into one damn meanie.

You must be wondering, _"What do you mean, Canon, Story-Line, and Plot?"_

Well, long, long ago, there was this whole other world filled with advanced technology they made this type of 'cart' that was manned by only one with a circlet of metal and lots of buttons. It could run faster than the average ninja.

It sort of went like this…

Average Ninja whose name I've already forgotten (Average ninja-person, etc., etc., WTF am I talking about again?, etc., etc.)

V.S.

Car (Some sort of high-tech cart that can move with a press of a button)

…

Average Ninja (Ninjago!)- 187 m.p.h.

Car- 240 m.p.h.

…

That's just one example of their technology. Others include hovercrafts, flying metal cabins, some sort of long-ranged weapon that can shoot metal balls at high speeds with a slight twitch of a finger called a gun… and much more… This world had an almighty being who went by Masashi Kishimoto. The almighty Masashi Kishimoto created the world Hyūga Hinata lived in, but in a story. A long, intricate story of the life and lies of their world. Eventually it was turned into a type of 'animation', and thus the slang of the weird words the reborn girl inside Hinata finally made sense. The girl inside the other girl had watched and read all the anime and manga of the world and knew exactly how deadly it was and who to simply avoid. She was wasn't willing enough to meet some creeps that the story beheld, like child molesters and other clansmen.

…

Why I keep thinking in third person? The world may never know! But I have an idea: It just keeps things much easier to explain, in simple terms.

Where was I last?

Oh, right.

Playing with Himawari.

Japanese was really hard to learn, so I only knew a few words, like all the foul language and the basics.

So when Kaa-san and I were done playing (rather one-sided playing, since I didn't like dolls), she and I were escorted to a meeting about boring politics and shit. That's also when I suddenly remembered that around my age, babies should be saying their first words.

This was going to be interesting…

"Asshole!" I screamed in the middle of a heated debate about removing the Caged Bird Seal. A few (Meaning One) Elders were with it, while the rest were all touchy about tradition and power. Like, who the fuck cares?

My chubby baby hand pointed at the antagonist of the situation, which unfortunately was Hiashi. Hiashi, as in the head of the Hyūga clan. Shit. Oh well, I can improvise…

"BIG FAT SHITFACE, FUCKER!" I hollered at the rest of the other antagonists. My tongue isn't used to shouting random things so I got whiplash, and I'm sure a few stutters slipped in here and there.

Himawari was frozen. Everybody else was beyond mortified.

I crawled out of Kaa-san's arms and army-walked to the only good guy around, with the exception of maybe other clansmen who were nice-ish.

"Good boy." I warbled before promptly falling asleep.

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**XXX**

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**A/N: And scene! Hello~. Sorry if the person here is a little perverted even though that's nigh impossible for someone so young, but this is a fanfic, so I'm just going to be lazy and say the unfortunate person stuck inside Hinata comes from an AU of Earth. Teehee. And why she only knows potty words and the basics of Japanese from her old life was because she only really pays attention to things that are grosser.**


	2. Calamity

**Hy****ū****ga Hinata, the One and Only **

**That shy, meek girl? Great. Now I'm suddenly glad for all those drama classes I took in my old life. I mean, Hinata is one of my favs, but it's going to be a blow to my ego to make my personality match hers. I'll be red in the face- hey, isn't that good? (SI OC into Hy****ū****ga Hinata!)**

**Disclaimer: Masashi Kishimoto owns all. I own the shitty plot and the poor unfortunate soul trapped inside Hinata.**

**…**

Needless to say, I wasn't allowed in the council room anymore until I turned that of a respectful age, like eight or nine. Bummer. Those councilmen could really use some help.

And I think I disappointed Kaa-san that my first few words had nothing to do with her. Usually, babies say 'Kaa-chan or Kaa-san, perhaps Tou-chan or Tou-san.' But my first sentence happened to be a string of curses. Heh. Before, my first word was beer. Eheh. That sure startled up Parents Number One. But they were drinkers and we owned a bar as a living, so it was expected. My older brother's first word had been the "S-word" and so on. Why you should never trust your drunken customers with innocent little children.

Since I was only a baby and (supposedly) didn't have any common sense, the Elders let me off the hook, though with a strange look on their face. I totally trolled them.

…

Four months passed by, and it was my birthday! I had turned one years old on December twenty-seventh. Really, that made me eighteen now. I was older than Kakashi, Asuma, Gai, and Kurenai, mentally. Physically… Well… That's one huge gap.

For my first birthday, it was more like a political party with only Hyuga between the Elders, the higher ranking Cadet Branch members who had closer relations with the Main Branch, and the latter. I was of the latter group. (Duh!)

The adults were drinking sake with dignity and were sober. Hum… A party without any drunkards doesn't exactly sound much fun. The kids (Neji and I) were in their mother's arms in the corner. I waved at baby Neji, who was two years old. He waved back. We were smart brats.

My bastard of a father was already talking about arranged marriages and my planned training regime. Fuck you…

I babbled in Kaa-san's arms, attempting singing Miley Cyrus' infamous song. Yes. I was dared to watch the music video, too, by my friends. It was… unexpected.

I dozed off along with Neji against a couch. Why? Because we were kids, darn it! And we needed our beauty sleep!

I woke up when the party ended, and everyone was starting to leave.

The Lower Branch members cleared the tables and cleaned the room. We let them be. My odd little family left together late at night, and since we were using the guest room in the middle of the compound, we had to walk to the far edge, where the Main Branch's house was. They tucked me in bed, and said "Good night Hinata-chan." (Not in unison, because that'd be darn weird), so I said:

"Bye-Bye bitches." Hiashi began coughing and Himawari sent me more strange looks, as to how I learned those words. Then they closed the sliding door.

…

The next few months were uneventful besides my first 'playdate' with Neji. Really, Kaa-san and his mom did all the talking while we ate, napped, and talked incoherent words. Mainly I just talked incoherently while Neji could speak without the person straining his/her ears and thinking: _What the hell is that brat talking about?_

I enjoyed his presence and happy-go-lucky smile. If only I could become friends with him and not ruin the canon line, then yay me. But there was no effective way without bomb-shitting the canon and events. Me without the knowledge was a dead me with knowledge. Because the Intel I took to the grave with me was among the lines of: _Darn it, I shouldn't have changed the story plot!_

My next birthday, my second birthday, was nothing short of exciting. I mean, all we did was talk and curse at the Hyuga Elders, and interrupt Hiashi talking about my arranged marriages with Hizashi. Totally notwithstanding. But hey! - Most of my slurs and stutters and speech slip-ups were gone! The baby tongue was not used to my fast-talking self, meaning I got whiplash constantly. But that was only a phase. Sooner or later I'd grow out of it. Starting now. Two years gave me time to clear my head and stop cursing people for the sake of cursing. I was a mature (-ish) teenager with straight C's! What more could you possible want?!

Meh.

The only reasons 'Why Being Clan Heir to the Hyuga was Nice' was that my Byakugan would be unsealed forever and ever, and that my clothes and food were prepared especially for me. I knew in this world I'd become a spoiled brat. So when I was truly trying, I tried acting shy. Oddly enough, it weirded out people. Well, the people at the meeting during when I cursed my voice dead.

And hmm… The closest significant plot case was when those Cloud ninja would kidnap me for the unsealed Byakugan. Hiashi would kill the guy, then Kumogakure would go bat-shit crazy and demand retribution. Then Hizashi, the clan head's identical twin, father to Neji, would take his place and die for him. But identical twins share the same DNA and looks, so the damn Cloud Ninja couldn't say anything without starting another war. But Konoha was pretty much recovered from the Kyubi attack, and we were allies with the Grass (Kusa) and the Waterfall (Taki) and Suna. Two of those weren't even harmed. But Kumogakure didn't have any allies (or any allies with enough man-power to bring down a nation). But within the next couple years, their power would take first place again.

When would I be kidnapped? Hinata was at least three, then, and Hanabi wasn't born. Yet. I should stop thinking third person. So _I_ would be three or four. And it happened after the formal meeting of Neji and I. We would were kimonos, right? Ah, darn this stupid memory. I needed to write it down.

But the Byakugan sees all.

Right.

Umm… English? Maybe? It was a code…


End file.
